Log in

No account? Create an account
Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Instruction: an exercise in dialogue
james, jack, jealous--original creation
seems_innocent wrote in sparrington
Title: Instruction
Author: seems_innocent
Pairing: vague sparrington
Rating: Mild R?
Disclaimer: Not my characters, no money made
Notes: An exercise in dialogue. 165 words

Oh dear this bunny JUMPED into my lap and well, here we are. The first and last lines quickly lead to the rest, and I'm generally pleased. I hope you like it.
I don't write much and am greedy for feedback. Feedback = more writing. You see how it works?

x-posted to pirategasm and seems_innocent

"Now, let's say you're Elizabeth, and I'm you."

"Why can't you be Elizabeth?"

"Because I've got to show you 'ow to be you, see?"


"Now look. You've gotta be firm. You take her about the waist, see, like this, and kiss 'er nice an' hard."


"Then you slip your hand down her rump, catch a lil squeeze along the way, see, an' lift her leg so's her knee's drawn up to yer hip."


"Now, see 'ow off balance you are? How you've got to cling to me for support, an' yer gettin' all flushed in the face?"


"Now, lessee. From here, it's just an awkward two-step to th' wall. . ."


"Sorry then. An' then, still squeezin' that nice thigh, you c'n press 'er against the wall into a full-on snog, an' give 'er a bit of a grind to let 'er know you mean business."


Jack gave him a last nip and an appraising look. "Now you c'n it try if y'like."

"Actually, I rather liked being Elizabeth."


  • 1
I love this in so many, many ways.

and I love you for saying so.

I'm loved!

...I love so much the last line. I need to have it's babies right away.

This was utterly delightful. I had a wonderful time reading it and really, the first and last lines were so awesome!!! The idea of Jack doing that with James and James going along with it...so cute and so hot!!! You rock!

I. . .rock?

eee! thanks, I'm so glad you liked it.


Very enjoyable! Thank you! ^_^

Lovely. Hot. Extremely funny.
So this is "how you should've done it"? Or did James just change his mind about trying to get her away from Will?

thank you!

This is an orphan scene, but I think this fits better into the general POTC fanon than canon. Maybe Will's run off to be a pirate, or (likely) there's some convoluted polyamory going on. Perhaps Jack's stolen Will from Elizabeth, and feels bound to help James get her? Do Jack and James have a relationship already, or is this the start of something? Or is it anything at all?

This one is entirely open to interpretation—I even considered replacing "Elizabeth" with "her," but decided against it.

Thanks so much!

Polyamourous get my my vote!
I think this is Jacks not-so-subtle way of seducing James, and showing him the fun of being dominated at the same time. Jack is already in a threesome with Will and Elisabeth, and is encouraging James to get in on the fun ::g::
You could've replaced Elisabeth with Will... ::eg::

ROFL! So very, very cute. James *could* try with Jack as Elizabeth, too ;)

all in good time. For now, I think James is learning he likes to be dominated.

I'm very glad you liked it.

Lovely! Loved the last two lines :)

feedback-->writing? Then write! XD


::::gasps for breath:::::


this is awfully yummy. i love it to death. (the images, oh the images!!)

Oh - waaaaah! Me likey! Yes! Muchly! *follows mind into gutter*
And as always, Jack is talking too much. *nods nods*
More please?

  • 1